For the past few weeks a thought has been haunting me…no, really…HAUNTING me. Do you ever have those moments when you know with 100% certainty that something was meant for you?
This was it for me:
“We need to prepare our children for the path…NOT prepare the path for our children.”
Sigh. So…yea…have we met? I’m Kris and I’m a people-pleaser/fixer (that’s a lethal combo). Over the past few weeks I’ve faced some interesting moments as a parent. I mean…I feel like I’m dancing delicately on the line between “fixing” and “guiding” with my kids. At times, that line is so fuzzy I’m not sure which side I’m falling on. It’s HARD to watch them jostled and struggling. Sigh, again.
And then today happens: I had the opportunity to stop time for about an hour. I met a friend who I’ve been dying to talk to—uninterrupted—for weeks. Today was the day! We even picked a restaurant that guaranteed we’d see NO ONE we knew (NO I won’t tell you our secret meeting spot…that’s why it’s a SECRET). For these moments I had with my friend, I’ll forever be thankful. We carved it out, and He was at the table with us. God is so cool like that.
We talked about the deep, gaping wounds of this life that we’ve both endured…and, the lil confusing bruises we attempt to heal from, too. We talked of our ultimate fears for our children; namely, the fear of THEM having to face these wounds, too. As moms, we ache to protect. We feel natural smoothing out the wrinkles of life. We nurture. We love. We hug. We hold. We protect.
And it was then that I realized this…the wounds I struggle(d) through were NOT because paths had been prepared for me. They were rough…hurtful…and sometimes, impossible to express with words…only groans and cries could suffice. Oh how hard that must’ve been for God to watch me crawl thru those times.
He COULD’VE prepared my path
…eased up on the ‘ugly’ a bit
…made it a lil smoother
…given me some answers to “WHY?”
He could’ve. But He didn’t. Because if He would’ve, I might not be who I am. I might not have made time for my friend who is carrying a world of hurts right now…I might’ve avoided her. I might not have the same compassions and understandings that I do have. The path had purpose…every ugly bit of it. He didn’t prepare my path, He was preparing me. He smoothed ME. “Refined” is the churchy word.
I’ve been given the great responsibility to “prepare” my kids…to help them down the path. That’s the difference…I GET TO be there with them on the path, no matter how hard it may be. I can still smooth out the wrinkles…just NOT by removing the obstacles. Instead, I’m the one putting the band-aids on when they fall…and then helping them back up.
Man, how many times has He done that for me?
So, today my prayer is this: SHOW ME THE DIFFERENCE. Help me prepare them for the path regardless of what that path may look like.